Monday, 09 May, 2011 09:03
Last Updated on Monday, 09 May, 2011 09:03
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For "Mother’s Day," I decided to take the missus out for
breakfast. This happened in spite of my rule, "Never go
out to eat on a holiday."
Years ago, I was told by a patient, who happened to be
a restaurant owner, that you were better off not to eat
out on holidays, or days like Valentine’s Day. He told me
this, in spite of the fact that his restaurant was open on
all those days. "It’s simple," he said, "on those days,
there are simply too many people to serve correctly.
The crush of customers dictates that everything move
faster than it really should and so nothing is as good as
it really ought to be."
In spite of knowing better, off we went. There was a
wait, but we were promised it wouldn’t be long. I didn’t
ask for a definition of the word "long," or just exactly what
"wouldn’t be long" meant.
As the missus and I were waiting, the front door opened,
and a herd of buffalo started streaming in. They were
people, of course, but they were really big people. Even
the smaller buffalo were large and they streamed right by,
just like the others in the herd. There were over two dozen,
by my rough calculations, and they had apparently reserved
a very large table.
As soon as the dust settled, the missus and I were seated,
and I told her to hurry up and make up her mind, so
we could get our order in, before the herd did. I was afraid if we
didn’t get our order in, there might not be any food left. The
missus agreed with me (I wrote it down) and we were both
relieved.
I had a good view of the herd from where I sat and there
were 30 of them, to be exact. I was trying to find one of the
herd that weighed under 200 pounds, but it was a close call.
The stress on those chairs was evident and every time
someone moved, there was a creak, from the wood being pushed
to where it had never been before.
The herd was also loud. There was a cacaphony coming from
that table that would have rivaled a stockyard’s, complete with
banging, clanking, jingling and various other sounds. It was
almost like being on the street in Manhattan at high noon, with
horns beeping and people howling.
I was closest to four women, who were too big to be Lane Bryant
models, and over all the noise, they were discussing "what colors
have a slimming effect." This really tripped my trigger and the
only thought I had was …camouflage. I don’t know if it would be
slimming, but it would help you blend in with the park.
I told the wife what I was thinking and she gave me a look…
you all know what I’m talking about, but then she cracked and
couldn’t stop laughing, herself.
Thankfully, we got our food and got out of there, before I
could do any damage.
So you’re now left with two choices. You can either invest in
a lot of camouflage, or you can try fighting the flubber with
my weight loss plan. I can tell you I don’t have to worry about
"slimming colors" anymore, because I’ve lost 60 pounds and
have kept it off for more than two years.
http://www./numberonefatlosssecret
Maybe we should go back to the fig leaf test. If you look
fat with a fig leaf, you have to hunt and kill your next meal.
I’ll have to run that one by the ACLU.
I’ll be back tomorrow with more.
With my best wishes for your optimum health,
Dr. Bill
breakfast. This happened in spite of my rule, "Never go
out to eat on a holiday."
Years ago, I was told by a patient, who happened to be
a restaurant owner, that you were better off not to eat
out on holidays, or days like Valentine’s Day. He told me
this, in spite of the fact that his restaurant was open on
all those days. "It’s simple," he said, "on those days,
there are simply too many people to serve correctly.
The crush of customers dictates that everything move
faster than it really should and so nothing is as good as
it really ought to be."
In spite of knowing better, off we went. There was a
wait, but we were promised it wouldn’t be long. I didn’t
ask for a definition of the word "long," or just exactly what
"wouldn’t be long" meant.
As the missus and I were waiting, the front door opened,
and a herd of buffalo started streaming in. They were
people, of course, but they were really big people. Even
the smaller buffalo were large and they streamed right by,
just like the others in the herd. There were over two dozen,
by my rough calculations, and they had apparently reserved
a very large table.
As soon as the dust settled, the missus and I were seated,
and I told her to hurry up and make up her mind, so
we could get our order in, before the herd did. I was afraid if we
didn’t get our order in, there might not be any food left. The
missus agreed with me (I wrote it down) and we were both
relieved.
I had a good view of the herd from where I sat and there
were 30 of them, to be exact. I was trying to find one of the
herd that weighed under 200 pounds, but it was a close call.
The stress on those chairs was evident and every time
someone moved, there was a creak, from the wood being pushed
to where it had never been before.
The herd was also loud. There was a cacaphony coming from
that table that would have rivaled a stockyard’s, complete with
banging, clanking, jingling and various other sounds. It was
almost like being on the street in Manhattan at high noon, with
horns beeping and people howling.
I was closest to four women, who were too big to be Lane Bryant
models, and over all the noise, they were discussing "what colors
have a slimming effect." This really tripped my trigger and the
only thought I had was …camouflage. I don’t know if it would be
slimming, but it would help you blend in with the park.
I told the wife what I was thinking and she gave me a look…
you all know what I’m talking about, but then she cracked and
couldn’t stop laughing, herself.
Thankfully, we got our food and got out of there, before I
could do any damage.
So you’re now left with two choices. You can either invest in
a lot of camouflage, or you can try fighting the flubber with
my weight loss plan. I can tell you I don’t have to worry about
"slimming colors" anymore, because I’ve lost 60 pounds and
have kept it off for more than two years.
http://www./numberonefatlosssecret
Maybe we should go back to the fig leaf test. If you look
fat with a fig leaf, you have to hunt and kill your next meal.
I’ll have to run that one by the ACLU.
I’ll be back tomorrow with more.
With my best wishes for your optimum health,
Dr. Bill
Favorite Formulas, 816 Turtle River Court, Plant City, FL 33567, USA
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