Before I get to this burning issue, I heard a great joke today. Here
it is:
A three year old boy is in the bathtub, examining his genitals. He
is particularly fascinated by his testicles. He asks his mother,
“Mom…are these my brains?”
His mother replies, “Not yet.”
That’s a good one, I don’t care who you are.
Every day, we get bombarded with images of “hard bodies.” These are
the guys and gals who make a lot of dough pretending to be fit. Now
some actually are fit, like the people in the P90X commercials, but
most aren’t. They are young, they are good looking and when they
aren’t, you don’t see them anymore. They’re certainly not like Jack
Lalanne, who looked the same for seventy years.
There is a huge difference between looking fit and actually being
fit. Tyra Banks looks fit, but couldn’t lift 5 pounds over her head.
Think about that for a minute, because it happened on live
television. That means that she is so weak that she couldn’t hold an
average baby in her arms (which is probably one good reason why she
doesn’t have one).
It also means that she must be paying a boatload of mundo to a large
group of people, to schlep her shizz around (’cause you know a girl
like Tyra has a lot of shizz.) Oprah, on the other hand, can handle
a 10 pound bag of potatoes with ease. (Now you see it…now you
don’t…baked, fried, mashed, scalloped, gratineed…with or without
gravy, butter, garlic, cheese, sour cream, horseradish…its all
good.)
You don’t have to worry about either one of them having a six-pack,
or buns of squeal. (That’s a good one!) Does George Clooney have a
six-pack? How about Aaron Rodgers? How about Obama? (Hardly.)
Clooney and Rogers are actually in pretty good shape, but they
aren’t what you would call “cut.” They look natural, like they work
out a bit, but they aren’t obsessive.
A friend of mine, who trains people in Southern California, knows a
few things about beautiful women. He’s trained hundreds of them:
models, actresses, singers, he has a list that would make most
trainers cry. I asked him who was the fittest woman he ever
trained. “Oh, that’s easy,” he said. And of course he made me wait
…. “So who was it?” I said.
“Salma Hayek,” he said. It wasn’t an answer I would have thought of.
He said, “It didn’t matter what activity we did, or what program I
designed. She would do it and do it easily and laugh the whole time.
She didn’t worry about what she ate, but she never finished
anything, food or drink.”
“And,” he added, “she looked just as good without makeup as she did
with it, a rare thing in these parts.”
So stop for a moment…and release all the six-pack and buns of
squeal obsessions. Let them go. Going…going…gone. Do what you
need to do, to get the flabby pounds off and get yourself stronger.
You don’t want to be fat…or weak…but you don’t have to look like
Brad Pitt in “Troy,” either.
Start finding your fitness edge, with my book on weight loss:
And, like Salma Hayek, laugh all the way through your workout.
I’ll be back tomorrow with more.
With my best wishes for your optimum health,
Dr. Bill